The Lingerie Addict

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Why I Broke Up With Victoria’s Secret | The Lingerie Addict

“However, I must be honest and tell you the real secret behind the break up. While my issue with my former love is about size and also about quality (ask me about that another day!), it’s a deeper issue that burns my britches. What really bothers me about my ex, Victoria’s Secret, is that it even though it was about me, it was never really about me. From the fashion show to the ad campaigns, the purpose of displaying lingerie was not about me delighting in my own pleasures and feeling confident and empowered by the very articles I placed closest to my skin. Nor was it about me luxuriating in my femininity and choosing to own my sensuality as a woman without having to be overtly sexy or swing the other way to being puritanical and prudish. Nope!

It was, as it has been, about the male perspective. What does he want to see in lingerie? Who does he want to see it on? This limited perspective can be dangerous. I’m more than an object to be viewed and inspected, but a being of depth and dimension. A woman who dwells in the fullness of herself and deserves to be treated as such! Which is why I took my love, attention, and business to small boutiques, online retailers, and other stores that appreciated me for all that I was.”

(Read the full article on The Lingerie Addict.)

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Dear Bra Fitters: Stop Using ‘Tribal Women’ to Make a Point About Bras.

Excerpt from the article “Do Bras Prevent Breast Sagging?: Why We’re Having the Wrong Conversation” via The Lingerie Addict.

This next issue is one that really gets under my skin. I am sick and tired of the lingerie community resorting to examples of anonymous, bare-chested, tribal woman to make a point that going without bras will somehow “ruin” your body.

Not only is that kind of commentary ethnocentric in the extreme (“Hello!!! There are more ways of being beautiful than the Western way!“), I hate the notion of using someones ethnicity and culture as some kind of lazy prop to make ill-conceived points about superiority. And yes, it’s totally body snark.

These women’s bodies do not exist to teach women in our part of the world a “lesson” about what happens if you’re not a good girl who keeps her bra on. There is nothing wrong or inferior or degrading or primitive about sagging breasts. There is nothing wrong or inferior or degrading or primitive about non-Western standards of beauty. And there is nothing wrong or inferior or degrading or primitive about a culture placing more emphasis on the practical function of breasts rather than their decorative nature. And people need to stop acting like there is.

Moreover, when we pretend that sagging breasts are attributable to anything other than the factors mentioned above (age, weight loss, breast size, number of pregnancies, and smoking), we do women a disservice.

Sagging breasts aren’t something that happen because you’re “irresponsible” and went too long without wearing a bra. They’re something that happens as a side effect of being alive and carrying life. Some women’s breasts sag when they’re 18. Some women’s breasts sag when they get pregnant for the first time. Some women’s breasts sag when they become senior citizens. But ptosis (there’s that word again!) is a natural part of life, and there is no miracle bra, cream, or contraption (short of surgery) that will change that. Let’s stop setting women up for failure with unrealistic expectations.  Sagging is okay. More than okay, it’s perfectly normal.

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